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Wife woes

A weekly family column for the 100 Mile Free Press
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I’m starting to think 2017 might be my wife’s year as far as egregious farces go.

We regularly take walks given that we have a dog. In recent weeks, wolves took down a deer along one of our regular walking trails.

This week, my wife went out into the yard to get some wood. Before long she called me to come outside.

She found a big canine poop in our yard; our dog is fairly large, but it was definitely too large for our dog, also too big for a coyote. Additionally, the wolves on the property have definitely been teasing our dog. She’s been barking, which she normally never does, and, at times, has been uncomfortable going outside.

She believed it was wolf poop and was quite concerned. She took some pictures and was planning to talk to her parents about it.

Meanwhile, completely forgetting her friend’s large dog was over in the last week.

Subsequently, we went to Williams Lake this weekend for our baby’s nine-month doctor’s appointment.

She wanted to stop at the Visitor’s Centre so she could breastfeed the baby before we started driving home.

While there, she also decided she wanted to get a onesie for a friend of ours who just had a baby.

First, however, she went downstairs in the Visitor’s Centre. She breastfed him and asked if I would hold him while she looked through the onesies. I said “sure” and she went back upstairs while I stayed there with him.

She walked through the Visitor’s Centre, looking around a bit and started a conversation with the lady behind the counter, who as it happens is my sister in law’s cousin. On a side note, I’ve long ceased being surprised about my wife’s seemingly endless stream of family members, ever since I went to university in Ottawa and made friends with a girl who also turned out to be related to my wife despite Ottawa being on the other side of the country.

Anyways, halfway through that conversation, she came to the realization she hadn’t buttoned her shirt back up after breastfeeding (although luckily had relatched her bra).

Finally, the little critter has started playing catch with me, if you can in fact call it catch when there’s no catching involved (“pass” maybe?). When she tried to do the same he appeared to flat out refuse.

While 2018 has been quite kind to me so far, I think my wife might have gotten out the wrong side of 2017.