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Cariboo author chronicles life with MS

Heidi Redl’s memoir A Quiet Roar shows personal struggle and perseverance
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In a touching story about family, courage and the challenges of living with multiple sclerosis, Heidi Redl chronicles the struggles and joys of her life in her memoir and first published book, A Quiet Roar.

The Cariboo author, based in 150 Mile House, details living with the disease in a book she originally wrote for her family.

“Hopefully I’ve set a good idea in how to handle it,” she says. Although she admits the chance of her children being diagnosed with MS is small, the chances do double for people with a close relative with MS, from two to four per cent.

The message Redl hopes she sends: “Never, never, never give up.”

Multiple sclerosis, or MS, is a chronic disease where the immune system attacks the central nervous system. People living with MS can experience a range of symptoms caused by a blockage of signals from the brain to the body leading to anything from trouble walking to numbness or a loss of control in various limbs, fatigue, pain or even loss of focus or depression.

Redl was diagnosed with the disease in 2004.

A particular feature of the book are the relationships Redl forms in her life along the way, from the supportive group of her writing club, to the women, both managers and customers, at Curves where she worked. Key to her life are her three children, Ben, Sam and Lexie, but also her husband, Tom, who Redl is sometimes forced to rely on.

“They are my support system and I like to think I am part of their support system,” she says.

“Especially if you are dealing with a disease like I am, where you are losing a little bit almost imperceptibly almost daily, it is really, really important to have good social contact, good friends and a support system.”

Originally taken from bits and pieces Redl recorded in her diaries and in her writings from periodicals, such as Canadian Cowboy Country and the Kamloops MS newsletter, the book pulls the reader alongside Redl on her journey, following along as she starts a family and as she loses the ability to do things she had once loved — like riding horses — to trying a new and somewhat controversial treatment for MS and also re-asserting her independence in different ways.

“I’d always thought that I was a very strong person and finding that I just cannot physically do the things that I used to do —I have to rely on other people now and for me, that is not physically so tough, but emotionally it’s difficult. I hate being dependent on other people and yet there are things that I just can’t do for myself anymore.”

The struggle comes through in the book, as Redl documents her struggles with depression but also the moments where she learns to take heart and move forward.

“The journey through MS is a really emotional one and it’s taken me probably 12 years to get to the place that we call acceptance. Now I can accept it and it’s been a real eye opener in ways… Emotionally I have grown tremendously through this journey so I would say I’ve actually come out of it stronger than I was 12 years ago,” she says.

“I would want people to not give up. I want them to realize that there’s always hope. There is a cure out there somewhere,” she says. “Even if you are in a wheelchair, don’t think that your life is over. There are still ways that we who are disabled can be useful people. We can still contribute.”

Redl says it has been easier to chronicle her journey in writing than actually talk about living with MS.

“In a way, it’s helping me figure out how I am dealing with it.”

Redl will be at Nuthatch Books in 100 Mile House from 11 a.m. until 2 p.m. on May 31 for a book signing.

“I think this book hopefully gives people some inspiration in fighting whatever it is they are fighting. I hope it encourages them to fight and not to give up, to sit down and say my life is over.”